Frozen en Pointe
by theworldabove
Summary: AU in which Arendelle is the family name, and Elsa and Anna's parents own a ballet company. After Anna gets hurt, Elsa vows she will keep her sister safe from her parents ambitions. No powers. TRIGGER WARNING: suicidal/self harm thoughts, anorexia, anxiety. Rated M for these reasons. Please, please read and review !
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

"Come on, Elsa, hurry!" Giddy, the two sisters chase each down the stairs, running faster and faster to the small park next door to their apartment.

"Anna, slow down!" calls out the elder one, her platinum hair billowing behind her as she tuggs it out of the tight braid that had been giving her a headahce all morning. Her limbre legs moved gracefully as she ran to keep up with her younger sister, whose hand was wrapped firmly around her own.

When they finally reached the park, the pair were hot and sweaty, the mid july sun blazing above their heads, and the once-green grass prickling their bare feet.

"Oh, Elsa, won't you dance for me?" Elsa rolled her eyes.

"It's too hot to dance, Anna."

But her little sister was not to be persuaded. "Oh, please! Please? You're such a beautiful dancer! I wish I could be more like you." Hesistantly, Elsa shook her head again. She didn't want to dance, but she didn't want to dissapoint her sister. "Well, if you won't dance, I will!"

Stiffling a giggle, Elsa pushed up her chin, and in all seriousness, said; "I dare you."

With a smirk on her face, Anna ran to the small park bench in the far corner of the park, and arranged herself neatly next to it, clearly intending to use it as a make shift barre. She stood beautifully, feet nearly perfectly turned out in first position, and her arms poised perfectly in front of her in third. With a small smile, she place on hand on the bench, and prepared herself for what looked like a grand plie. Elsa smiled.

Instead, a steady beat trickled out of her pink lips, hips swishing back and forth, arms thrashing wildy. She chased Elsa around the park, twirling and cartwheeling to her hearts content. Eventually Anna's music slowed to a stop, and she finished her performance with a slightly clumsy, but obviously well rehearsed pirouette.

Clapping wildly, her older sister smiled maniacally, her hair tangled and cheeks red from being chased by her younger sister. Out of breath, the two fell back into the grass, limbs tangling and hands joined. For a few minutes, they were just together, sisters, best friends, soulmates.

"Elsa?" Anna's voice was drowsy; sleepy and quiet.

"Yes, Anna?"

"Will you dance for me now?"

"Yes."

Elsa's movements were quiet, even, and her beauty was cruel. She stood slowly, emotion reaching right to the tips of her fingers, meaning portrayed through everybone in her body; her neck to her calves. She slipped easily into a solo she had choreographed for herself months ago; an adaption of the ugly ducking. But before she could properly begin, a rough hand was on her shoulder, and she could hear the sweet sound of Anna's voice.

"Please, mama? Just one dance?" Elsa opened her eyes.

She instantly regretted it.

Her mother stood before her, dressed impeccably, holding Anna's hand.

"Elsa! What are you out here? You could hurt yourself! The audition is tomorrow, and you _must _go inside and practice! You forget, Elsa, that it isn't just your career riding on this, but this whole family's reputation and heaven help me if our business is ruined because you can't even support your arms properly!"

Tears threatened, but Elsa held her ground. "Yes, mother, of course. I'll go now." And without so much as a relucatant glance at her sister, she turned on her heel, and ran.

By the time Elsa came downstairs, dinner had gone cold. She could here her mother and Anna talking quietly in the lounge room, and her father typing anxiously in his study. As her tired feet moved slowly down the hall, the voices grew louder, and it wasn't because she was getting closer.

"Please, Mama? Can't I go?" Anna.

"No, Anna. You have dance class that day." Anna sighed audibly.

"Mama, please! I have dance class _everyday! _And my whole class is going! To the zoo! Mrs Montgomery even said we might see a tiger!" It was Elsa's turn to sigh.

"Well, maybe if you worked harder at your turns, you wouldn't have to take so many classes."

UNfortunately, she wasn't surprised, or even slightly shocked. It wasn't unsual, or even slightly out of the ordinary for for Mrs Arendelle to deny her daughters something, because of dance,

"Elsa. That was simply stunning." The head of the board smiled. Instructors always told her what an incredible a dancer she was. They complimented her technique, her showmanship, her flexibility, even the structure of her feet. But what sort of compliment was that? Who had control over what sort of feet they had?

Uncomfortable, she resisted the urge to tug at her leotard, or to undo her hair from the tight bun that was giving her a headache, or to rip her audition number from her back.

Instead, she smiled charmingly, and sunk into a deep curtsey.

"Thankyou, Madmoieselle. I only had the greatest of teachers." The whole panel smiled at this. Her mother, Eleanor, was a prima ballerina in the New York Ballet, and which her father owned, in addition to the American Ballet Academy. She was practically royalty in the ballet world.

"Yes, I can see that the apple indeed does not fall very far at all from the Arendelle tree. Of course, you must understand that your audition will be based entirely on your performance skills, we cannot grant you any special favours just because you are the daughter of William Arendelle himself!" Elsa smiled politely.

"Of course, Madmoiselle, I look forward to hearing from you." Elsa curtsied again before fleeing from the room.

Once she was tucked safely in a bathroom stall, Elsa let it go. She felt herself collapse, salty tears smudging the makeup her mother had spent so much time perfecting, her frantic hands pulling at her slick hair, the straps of her three hundred dollar leotard falling of her shoulders.

Elsa didn't want this. She didn't want any of it. Her parents had pushed her to breaking point, and that was just to make sure she secured a place at their own ballet school. She wasn't stupid enough to even _hope _that her parents would lay off during the term. Because she would get in. Of course she would.

And to think, soon it would be Anna in her place, cracking under the pressure. She didn't deserve it. No one did. Especially not her naive younger sister, filled with so much inner sunshine that birds sung to her, the sun shone, and flowers bloomed. There was no way that Anna could survive for a second in a place like this, but she it didn't matter, because there would be no other way to please their parents.

Well, not if Elsa could help it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

The letter came on a thursday. It seemed fitting that, her least favourite day of the week, would be the day that would change her life forever. To ruin it.

_Ms Arendelle, _

_We are pleased to inform you that you have been successful in your audition for the Amercian Ballet Academy. Congratulations on your achievement, we look forward to seeing in you in the fall!_

_Sincerely, _

_Deputy Headmistress, _

_ Anabelle Van Der Built. _

Anna's chin rested on her shoulder, and her eyes were alight with excitement.

"Elsa! You did it! You're in! Oh, Elsa, I knew you could do it! I just _knew it!" _Elsa smiled, but her eyes did not follow her mouth, and the smile was a sad one. Despite her bravery, a very tiny part of her had hoped that perhaps she had made a mistake in the solo, or that her lines were undefined, or perhaps her leaps weren't quite high enough.

Of course, none of that mattered.

Her parents were king and queen, and the deputy was a loyal servant. Elsa suspected that even if she had stood still, in the centre of the room for the entire audition, she would have made it in the the school with a stellar recommendation from the board. But that was that.

That was that.

"What are you going to have Elsa?" Anna was giggling wildy, pointing and flexing her feet under the table, and holding hands tightly with her big sister. "I think I'm going to order pizza!" The whole family was out to dinner to celebrate Elsa's success.

"I think I'll have pizza, too, Anna." Her mother frowned.

"Oh, no Elsa. You are student at ABA now, you'd be much better off with a salad." Sighing, she passed her menu over to her mother, telling her to go ahead and order what ever she thought fit for her daughter.

Elsa slept fitfully that night. Her legs ached and her feet itched. But she was too worried to sleep. She couldn't stop thinking about Anna, about herself. How was Anna going to cope with the pressures of her parents once she was away at school? How was _she _going to cope with the pressures of her parents once she was away at school?

Anna's sing-song voice haunted her in the darkness.

_"Your such a great dancer, Elsa."_

_"I wish I could be more like you, Elsa."_

_"I can't _wait _to go on pointe, Elsa!"_

Images replayed again and again, past and present.

_Anna, alone in the studio, feet bloody, arms poised. Rehearsing the same steps over and over, again and again, desperate to please their parents. _

_Her mother, strict and scolding, telling her that she wasn't good enough, that she would never be good enough._

_The two of them, alone forever, together but lonely, matching red shoes, turning and turning again and again. _

She woke gasping, anxiety coating her body like sweat. Without further thought, she slid from her bed, and grabbed the pointe shoes hanging off her door knob.

She didn't bother to glance at Anna's bed. If she had, she would have seen it was empty.

By the time she got to her parents studio, her heart beat had slowed, but tears had come. Dancing, despite being the source of all her problems, would make it better. Because, despite everything, she did love to dance, to lose herself in her problems, to immerse herself in some one else's emotions. It wasn't ballet she hated, it was the system.

Not looking where she was going, not even thinking, she walked into what she thought was an empty studio.

Only it wasn't.

There was Anna, poised at the barre, perfect arms, meaning full lines. Right down to her feet. Which were dressed in a pair of Elsa's old pointe shoes.

"Anna, be careful," Elsa cried, not thinking.

It was then that her world shattered.

Stunned by Elsa's appearance, Anna spun around quickly, not thinking about her feet, tripping over the too big shoes. A sickening crack reverberated in the air, and Anna's mouth pushed it self open. Her face gave it away.

"Anna," Elsa was rooted to the spot_. _"Anna, please," But Anna wasn't listening. She just kept falling. Arms wild, she fell backward, skull smacking against the wooden bar.

Elsa's feet started moving before she could even comprehend what was really happening. Scooping her younger sister up in her arms, she started to sob, feeling the sticky blood on the back of her head.

"Mama, Mama! Papa, please, it's Anna!" She could barely get the words out, her lungs struggling to swallow the air they needed.

_Anna, Anna, Anna, Anna. _

Her parents came, quickly, although the time went slowly, every second seared into her memory.

"Anna!" Her mothers voice was sharp, a point of clarity in Elsa's haze of blood and tears. Her father was on the phone, calling an ambluance, and in a single second Anna was lifted from her arms and into her mothers, pushed into a corner, alone with nothing but her thoughts to keep her company.

It was hours before she heard anything. Luckily, none of the damage was permanent. A cracked skull. Concussion. Ankle broken in three places. Sprained toes.

She blamed herself, and of course, one phone call to her mother confirmed that she thought exactly the same thing.

Alone and forgotten, she backed herself into her room, into a corner, into the cupboard. The tears came quickly, and she wondered if she could Anna would ever forgive her, if she could ever forgive herself. It wasn't for days, weeks, months, until she realised that maybe she didn't want to.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

She didn't see Anna the day she went away to school. She didn't see anyone. It was in the same city, only ten blocks away, but she still felt lonely. Anna was healing, and it only took a few days for her to be back to her crazy, headstrong, beautiful self. But Elsa couldn't see that. All she could see was the cast on her ankle and a bandage around her head.

"Now girls, back in line." Elsa was tired, but she move quickly back to her spot, rolling her neck and adjusting the straps of her sweaty leotard. "You are not feeling the music, or the emotion. This dance is about hidden beauty, about realising one's true self. None of your performances were even close to professional." She paused, a sly smile sneaking onto her face. "Except maybe Elsa."

Elsa's shoulders dropped visibly. She knew what was coming.

"Why don't you perform it for the class, Elsa? Maybe they will learn something." Knowing better than to protest, Elsa took her spot in the centre of the floor, arms curved with absolute intention, spine straight, muscles tightened. She executed the solo with ease, slow and steady, every single step pregnant with sigficance. It was easy, because it was the dance Anna had always loved. The Ugly Duckling. It was the dance the two of them had shared forever, and it was the only thing that could make her forget.

Always a sharp needle of clarity, her mothers voice cleared her haze and pushed her back into reality.

"That was lovely, darling, but really, you need to work on your arms... and your legs. Oh your lines, they were kind of blurry." Sighing inwardly, Elsa resisted the urge to reply with a snarky retort, and instead embrace her mother firmly.

"Mother, what a surprise." Her voice was flat, totally void of the emotion that had, only seconds ago, been seeping from every inch of her body. But her mother didn't notice. She never did.

"Yes, well, I was thinking we could have dinner tonight. The company is back in town for a few days, and since I haven't seen you since you left for school nearly five months ago, I thought it would be a good chance to catch up."

"Um, sure, mother, but I kind of have class at the moment, but if your really in a hurry, i guess i could-" But before she could finish, her mother was talking again, eyes glued to her stomach.

"No, no, I can wait. By the looks of things, you need to work on your technique anyway, but tonight, eight'o'clock? By the palace? Great, see you then honey." Without even so much as good bye, her mother was gone, and Elsa was alone, again. Even there, in the studio, together with 13 other girls, a choreographer, a pianist, and an instructor, she was lonely.

Elsa was always lonely.

She didn't want to go. She knew exactly how the night was going to play out. But, she didn't want to give her parents any more reason dislike her, or anymore reason to take there frustrations out on Anna. So she went.

First she spent and hour agonizing over what to wear. The she spent thirty minutes pinning her hair into the tightest possible bun. The she spent another three quarters of an hour rubbing on makeup that she didn't know how to apply. The she spent another hour taking it all off, tugging on a new outfit, and brushing her hair back into a loose braid.

Her mother was a quarter of an hour late.

Dinner was a quiet affair. They barely talked at all, that was, until Eleanor took her daughter up to her hotel room, and sat her down on a barely used sofa.

"Anna got her cast off today," Unable to contain herself, Elsa smiled at this news.

"That's great!"

"Her doctor's think she should be able to dance again in a few months." Her smile faded.

"Dance? Again? Mum! She just broke her ankle! She _cracked open her skull! She could have died!_"

Her mother pushed off her concerns with a wave of her hand, "It can happen to any dancer, Elsa. It doesn't mean that we should stop dancing. I was actually thinking that she could come stay here in your dorm, attend the academy's junior program."

"Mum! She nearly died because she wanted to go on pointe! Because she wanted to be like me! You need to keep her away from me! You need to keep her safe!"

"Oh, Elsa. Don't be so dramatic. Anna did not _die, _nor did she come remotely close. And, just so you know, not everything is about you. Anna went on pointe because she is interested in dancing, unlike you. Just because she had one accident doesn't mean she should stay away forever!"

Elsa didn't want to argue, but she did anyway. Because this was Anna.

"Mum, I am here. I am giving away my life to dance, why isn't that enough for you? Why do you have to force her to be part of a world that she doesn't want!"

"Because she does, want it, Elsa." Her mothers voice was quiet and unforgiving. Elsa stood.

"Excuse me, mother. But I'm tired and I have class in the morning."

"Elsa, don't be such a drama queen! Come back here!"

But Elsa was already too far gone to hear it."

By the time she got back to the Academy, her anger had turned to rage. How could her mother think that Anna wanted this? That _anyone _wanted this? Who wanted to be broken and bleeding, lonely forever, with nothing but the stage to keep you company. Loved distantly by thousands, but personally by no one.

Maybe Anna did want to be a ballerina. But she shouldn't. And she wouldn't,

Elsa would protect her little sister, she would keep her safe, even if it meant breaking her heart.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Elsa didn't hear another word from her family until valentines day. Preparations for the end of year student production were well under way, and as the lead, Elsa was busier than ever. She dance nearly fifteen hours a day, and slept for only six. She had rehearsals ever afternoon, classes every morning, and school work in between.

She barely ate.

She had no time for herself.

Slowly, she was withering away to nothing.

On the fourteenth of february, rehearals were let out early, and Elsa wanted nothing more than to take a long hot bath, and to crawl into her bed.

That didn't happen.

Before she even unlocked the door to her dormitory, she knew something was different. There were an extra pair of shoes outside, and the lights were on, even though she had turned them off when she left that morning at before the sun rose.

As soon she smelled hot cocoa, she knew it was in an instant.

"Anna? What are you doing here?"

Her tiny bathroom in on gigantic leap, a smile plastered across her face. "Surpise!"

Elsa took a step back. This could not be happening.

"Mum said I could come visit you, stay for a week! I've missed you so much, Elsa. I've barely seen you since, well, since you got your letter I guess." Without another word, Anna knocked older sister over in a hug. "So what do you wanna do? I really want to see your school! Is it as amazing as mum says it is? I can't wait till my audition, so I can come and live with you, and we can be together forever. Or maybe we could go and build a snowman, there's still some snow left outside. Or maybe we could just watch a movie, I made cocoa and-"

"Anna. I'm really tired from rehearsal, I kind of just want to go to bed." Her younger sisters face fell visibly, sinking from her bold smile into a hesistant scowl.

"Okay, I guess that's cool. Maybe in the morning."

"Yeah, maybe."

She woke before the sun, and slipped out of the dormitory before Anna noticed that she was awake, scribbling a quick note on the back of a napkin and leaving it on the bedside table.

The studio was empty when she arrived. Techinically, she didn't have class for another three hours, but she worked better alone, and too keep her parents happy- and Anna's life stress free- she had a lot of work to do.

By afternoon rehearsals her feet were bleeding and her back ached. She hadn't slept the night before, and hadn't eaten since the previous morning. But she kept going anyway. For Anna.

The rest of the week past in much of the same fashion, and truth be told, she spent little to no time with her younger sister. On friday night Thursday morning she woke to fine Anna already up, but gave little thought to it.

That morning the studio wasn't empty. Anna was there, dressed in head to toe in dance gear.

"Hey Elsa, I thought, since you were so busy with dance, that I could dance with you!" Elsa frowned.

"I don't think so Anna."

"Please? I have to go home on saturday, and we've barely spent any time together. Just one morning?"

She should have said yes. She could have said yes. One lousy morning wasn't going to change anything. But she didn't.

Turns out her sister coming to visit her was the perfect way to change her mind about ballet.

"Don't you get it, Anna? I don't want this for you! I don't want any of it. You shouldn't either. It's hard and I'm scared for you! I don't want you to break!"

Anna smiled softly.

"I know you're scared for me, Elsa, but I'm not a little girl anymore! You have protected me my whole life, but I can make decisions for myself now, and this is what I want. Your whole life has been turned upside down. But that doesn't mean that you shouldn't want this! It doesn't mean that _I _shouldn't want this. I'm not you, Elsa! You've wanted to be a dancer your whole life, and so have I. Just because things have been a little tough lately doesn't mean you should give up. You should never give up. Not ever."

Elsa almost faltered in her stance. Because her sister was right. She had wanted this her whole life. And Anna did have the right to make her own decisions.

She almost smiled. She almost cried. She almost embraced her sister with an open heart.

"I didn't want to come to this, Anna. But I guess I should tell you the truth. You're just not good enough. You are too clumsy, too unfocused. Even mum and dad think so. I heard them talking last year. I don't want you to be dissapointed when you don't get anything out of this!"

For a minute, the two of them stood, eye to eye, breathing heavily.

It was Anna who broke the silence.

"I hate you." The words choked Elsa, the air suffocating her, pushing her backwards, she saw Anna run, cheeks red, eyes filled with regret.

And then blackness.

When Elsa woke up, she was alone in a hospital bed, a drip feeding into her arm, and a screen monitor her heart beat hooked up to her finger. Immediately she panicked.

"Anna?" Her voice was hoarse, and her tone was tentative. "Anna, are you there?" Anna was always there. Always.

That was when it came flooding back.

The argument.

Elsa's harsh words.

Before she could lapse into a total break down two figures barged into the room, clip boards poised, stethescopes around their necks.

"It's okay, Elsa. You passed out at school yesterday. When was the last time you ate something honey?"

"I don't know.. maybe two days ago? Three? Where's Anna?"

"Your sister is with your parents honey. They had to fly to San Fran Cisco with the company this morning once they knew you were going to be okay."

"Oh. Of course. Right. Can I go home now?"

"Sorry honey. You need to stay right here, we need to run some more tests, make sure you get the help you need."

"No, I don't need any help. I need ballet, I need to keep my parents happy, I-" She sat up, dizzy and unsure, sliding out of bed and making for the door. "Please, I need to practice- I need to keep Anna..." the nurse slid the needle from her neck, wiping the remaining anaestatic on her apron.

"Maybe you should call the girls parents. She's really messed up, Doc."

They didn't call her parents. It took some convinving, but eventually she was released, with a full stomach and a heavy heart, on the condition that she visited the infirmary every day.

For two days, she slept. She cried into her pillow, and she ate next to nothing. She didn't care.

On the third day, she went to class. People stared at her, but she took her place at the barre, and she danced. She didn't smile, she didn't talk to anyone. All she did was work.

Dance was all she had left, anyway.

Three weeks after she passed out, word came that Anna and her parents intended to stay in San Fran Cisco for the rest of the school year. Not by phone call, or even email, but from the dance mistress, Madame Kovarian.

_So what? _She thought, _who cares. _

Being lonely never bothered her, anyway.


End file.
